can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
