im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
