Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
