I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
