One girl and one boy is just not enough.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Randomize
