I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
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