I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
