Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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