what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
