Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
