Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
