Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
