i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize