I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
