so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
