ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I AM VODKA MAN
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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