i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
