Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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