come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize
