so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize
