its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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