ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
We got so high we made milksteak
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
