At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Randomize
