Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
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