Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
