Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize