We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
