look no pants
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
