Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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