As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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