What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize