Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
