$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
