I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
