all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
