Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
