Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I supernannyed him into submission
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