And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I just blew my weed a kiss
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
