she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
