doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
