But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
