Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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