I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I'm too high and old for this...
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
