i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Randomize
