Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Randomize
