I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
