I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Brb crying the tears of my youth
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
