U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
