he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Randomize
