Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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