i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
